Thursday, April 19, 2007

Sardar's funny jokes

1 A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after Every 10 sec a woman gives birth to a kid. A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.

2 Sardar-why r all these people running? Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup. Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?

3 Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".

4 Sardar was writing something very slowly. Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly? Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.

5 Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant it’s already raining.
Sardar: So what? Take an umbrella and go.

6 Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.

7 Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....

8 Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the car he was driving..

9 Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ? Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Little johny's jokes

TEACHER: Why are you late? L-JOHNY: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? L-JOHNY: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

TEACHER: Johny, why are you doing your maths sums on the floor?
L-JOHNY: You told me to do it without using tables!

TEACHER: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"?
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
L-JOHNY: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!

TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
L-JOHNY: Yesterday you said it's H to O!

TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now, Johny, who discovered America?
JOHNY: George!

TEACHER: Johny, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

TEACHER: Johny, why do you always get so dirty?
L-JOHNY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you are.

Teacher: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"

L-Johnny : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the sameday sametime."

L-Johnny : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?

Father : No. Why do you ask that?

L-Johnny : Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots!

L-Johnny: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair of the same at home.

Teacher: Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? L-Johnny : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

Teacher: Johny, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?

L-Johnny: No, teacher, it's the same dog!